The Return of the King (of procrastinators)

Watched The Passion of The Christ 2 times today (don't ask me why, because I'll have to kill you if I tell you). It's really such a powerful movie. Cried pretty badly both times (ok everyone remember this as the first time Elvin's openly and publicly admitting that he cries at movies!) but strangely, cried a lot more the second time I watched it...

Anyhow, I think what really made me cry was the fact that for every stroke of the whip, every hammer of the mallet, every drop of blood shed, was because of me.

My sicknesses gave Him those stripes across His back.

My sin and wickedness hung Him on that old rugged cross.

My guilt and shame put Him in that tomb and rolled the stone across the entrance.

Someone once said this to me. Everytime we sin, we're crucifying Christ all over again.

Sadly, it's nothing more than that. A saying. Useful head knowledge for counselling (other) wayward people. Sometimes, it actually keeps me from sinning. Sometimes.

Watching this show changed my entire perspective. I now imagine myself as the crazy, violent, mocking Roman soldier who whips away at the naked body of Jesus. That's me when I sin? That's right.

I imagine myself shoving that crown of thorns into His tender brow, sharp spikes stabbing into his head. And when I turn up o Sunday and worship, I might as well be the soldier kneeling down in mock worship. That's me when I sin? You bet.

I imagine myself kneeling down beside Him, lifting up the mallet and slamming it down onto the nail placed atop His outstretched palm. (Not too difficult, I get to play a Roman soldier in our Easter production) That's me when I sin? Uh-huh.

I imagine myself, the theif on the cross, punished for my sin, and yet still hurling abuse at Jesus. I imagine myself, the religious leader, spitting at Jesus and telling Him to save Himself. I imagine myself as Judas, betraying the Master with a kiss, for thirty pieces of silver.

I imagine myself as Peter, the Rock. Making all sorts of promises to Jesus. But falling short in the end. Way, way short.

That's me when I sin? Yup.

Everytime I sin, I crucify Christ all over again. Except now it's no longer a saying.

There're pictures to prove it.

This song takes a new meaning for me. Just typing out the lyrics made me tear.

On a hill far away
Stands a tall, mighty tree
Where a boy and girl used to take turns pushing the tyre swing
I remember the pocketknife in hand
And her name in my heart
Thinking there ain't no way for a boy to contain
The love that he feels inside
So I carve her name into my tree
And I carve a heart around the name
And I carved an arrow through the heart
Just to say "I love you"

On a hill far away
Stood an old rugged cross
The emblem of suffering and shame
I remember the nails through My hands
And your name in My heart
And how in their wordless ways those nails express
The love that I feel inside
When I carved Your name into My tree
And I wrapped My heart around your name
And I took your arrow through My heart
Just to say "I love you
I really love You"

Now I can never forget how much you mean to Me
Cos I will always remember whenever I see
Where I carved Your name into My tree
And I wrapped My heart around your name
And I took your arrow through My heart
Just to say "I love you
I really love You"

- Chris Rice, "My Tree"

I can never understand how God could love someone like me.
I will never know what led Him up to Calvary.
I will never comprehend why He would give His life on a cruel tree.
It's all beyond me...

But I'm thankful He did it anyway.

God is good. 8 souls saved for our (me and SL's) combined Big Bang! It was beautiful seeing young people giving their lives to God, and in such a simple way. When Su Linn asked two girls who gave their hearts to Jesus why they put up their hands to receive Jesus when the altar call was given, they replied, "Because I agreed with what you were saying, simple as that." God's in the business of soul-saving. And boy, is He good at it! This is the season, friends. Those who can, bring your loved ones, colleagues, friends to watch The Passion. Pray for their hearts to be open, and let God do what He does best (which is actually pretty much everything, of course, but here I'm talking specifically about touching hearts and changing lives). You'll see a harvest come in.

Alright, gotta go and sleep... long 2 days ahead tomorrow! No wait... long few days ahead cos exams are quite literally around the corner... they're NEXT WEEK! ARGH!! Here's exam timetable if you're praying *hint hint*

13 Apr Historical Variation in English
Urbanization in Southeast Asia

14 Apr Patterns in English: Grammar and Meaning
Making Sense of Society

Nitez people... and pray too for those two weird sores on my forehead AND a very irritating newly-sprouted pimple on my left cheek to GO AWAY! Oh, and while you're at it, pray I get a better barber the next time too... :)